Friday, August 18, 2017

my prom queen

Writer: Q

Senior year na kami ni naela, she's been my crush since we were in grade school.
She's an elite, top notcher in academic wise, got a deep kind eyes, and a smile that could make my day.
At dahil magkalapit lang surname namin, halos lahat ng classroom namin eh magkagroup or magkalapit kami sa seating arrangements.
I told my few friends about it, the feeling that i'm feeling towards her.
Then the rumor got out, diahe pre!
The part that I was thankful for eh di siya nailang or umiwas, ganun pa din niya akong ituring.

I was still her buddymate, who has a crush on her.

I was staring at her one afternoon as she was busy doing assignment. While i was just sitting in the table she was  writing on, under that mango tree, located at the back of the science building.
Then it hit me. Senior na kami. This will be the last year na kasama ko siya. For everyday since grade school, nasanay na akong kasama siya. To walk with her after school. Nasanay na ako na  samahan siya sa twing bibili siya ng paper sa labas, or magpaphotocopy, o sasaglit sa canteen to buy some food.
Nasanay na kong marinig yung hagikhik niya when i tell a silly joke.
Nasanay na ako sa mga simpleng hawak sa kamay, mga pag-alalay, mga pagdikit ng braso, mga pandaliang pag-akbay.

"Nae...", i called her.

Umangat siya ng tingin sakin and asked me why.

"Prom is coming, who'd you bring? I mean who's your date?", i asked.

"I dont know.. well Allen asked me, randy did, and some other guys.
but i havent figured out yet.
This is our last year, and last prom, i want it to be special.
Eh ikaw, did you asked anyone or may nag-ask na sayo?", balik tanong niya.

"Wala pa..."
But at the back of my mind, i want it to be her...


She's waiting for me to talk but there is a resistance lump on my throat.
But i closed my eyes, opened my mouth, and even my whole being was surprised to the question i asked her.

"Will you go to the prom with me?"

Nakita ko sa mata niya ang pagkagulat.
Hindi ko alam kung masiyado lang siyang mabait sa lahat ng bagay pero di ko nakita o naramdaman yung mga negative things na inaasahan ko.

"Why me nick?", she asked.

"Cos you're the prom queen, everybody wants the prom queen", pabiro kong sabi .

She looked into my eyes and said, "Yung totoo nick? I want the truth"

I hesitated, but here I am, i took the first step, might as well take some more.

"Because i like you nae.. and i think ive been liking you so much and for a very long time, it turned into love. And i want this prom to be special to"

"No... you are my friend nick.. and i'm terrified to this idea. We've been friends a long time, wag nating sirain yun. But im glad you finally told me. Id rather you told me kesa sinabi mo muna sa iba, sana."

Her rejection crushed my heart.
Pinilit kong ngumiti .
"Ok nae, i understand... i'll see you at the prom"


Walang excitement.
Walang saya
The idea of going there alone made me not want to go, pero lahat sila pupunta so i have to go.

I got out of my car, i was late...
I proceeded to the basketball court where it was being held.
Ongoing ang isang sweet song pagdating ko.

Hinanap agad ng mata ko kung nasaan si naela.. and as i expected, di naman siya mababakante ng sayaw eh.
She's dancing with vince.
Oh God, she's so beautiful. Pero masakit na makita siyang nakahawak sa iba.

"Oh nae.... how i adore you", sabi ng isip ko

She saw me, i looked away.
I decided to just go outside...

I was staring at the big, green, soccer field, when someone in a distance said hey....

I looked at the person who said that..
She was wearing a red dress.. almost a gown.. and a shiny, small tiara.
But her smile and eyes outshined any glittery thing tonight.

"Hey nick.." she mumbled.

"Hey nae... you look beautiful"

"And you're gorgeous nick"

"Nasaan ang date mo?", pag-iiba ko.

"You are my date nick...",
Di ko alam ang magiging reaksiyon ko, pero para akong mabibingi sa kabog ng dibdib ko.

"I'm sorry na natakot ako.
Takot akong bumagsak ang grades ko, at sa sasabihin ng mga tao.
Takot akong mang-dedma ng tao, dahil magagalit sila at sasabihan akong snob.
But through the years, akala mo hindi ko alam... maliit o malaking bagay nick na nagawa mo, i noticed it.
Sa kampanya ko as a student body leader, sa mga extra mile that you did for me...
Pero nick... takot kasi ako eh...
But i realized last night...
Saan ba ako dadalhin ng mga takot ko?
Ive been waiting for you to say how you feel for me... pero natakot din ako... kasi nararamdaman ko din yun sa'yo.
At natatakot ako sa mga sasabihin ng tao"

Speechless ako , but my heart is bursting out with happiness..

"Takot din ako nae... pero nagpakatotoo lang ako."

"Im conquering my fear now nick. Let's make this night special"

Inabot niya sa akin ang kamay niya,
Hinawakan ko naman ito
And then she led me to the court.

Sobrang kaba yung naramdaman ko, pero mas sobra ang saya na nananaig sakin.

Before we dive in to the sea of people who were perplexed to see us holding hands,
Tiningnan ko siya at bumitaw sa kamay nia, sabay tanong:

"Nae... sure ka?"


"Pero i'm not gonna be the prom king, and you are the prom queen" tanong ko na naghahanap ng assurance.

Ngumiti siya at sinabing
"They better get used to two queens...
Cos there is no way i'm not gonna dance with you tonight nicola...
You look good in your dress by the way..
I told you.. you're gorgeous.."
Saka niya nilahad ulit ang kamay niya.

I smiled, i know that if we don't do this, we'll regret it forever...
I reached out her hand then walked with her.
She smiled... i exhaled...
There are people around us that will judge us, but they won't get in our way.
They don't feel how we feel. They won't give us our happiness.
They are looking at us, but i am not scared.
I am not scared anymore.
We are free.
We reached the center of the dance floor and i clasp her other hand.
She smiled, i smiled, i looked into her eyes...
And then we started to sway.

*the end*

Friday, December 4, 2015

anndito na ako

Andito na ako.. di mo pa dama...
Malapit na ko.. sa iba nakatutok ang yung mata..
Sinamahan mo nga ako... nasa iba ang isip mo..
Para bang lumayo ka pero sinisilip mo..
Kelangan pa ba kitang layuan...
Para ako'y iyong maramdaman...
Kelangan pa bang dumistansiya..
Para malaman mong hindi siya?
Sana... yan ang dasal...
Marahil isang pagpapakahangal..
Isang buntong hininga, bago ako lumapit...
Isang malaking ngiti ang aking pinilit...
November 26, 2015
Macapagal ave

Friday, September 18, 2015

Jack and Jill

Come Jill.. to the world of sin...
Yes jack to the world unseen…
Together we climb the mountain top
And let’s fill up what’s lacked

Come Jill let’s make new mistakes
Yes jack… whatever it takes…
You’re not my rose.. But when you jump, ill jump remember?
Its crystal clear jack… we will do this together...

Where to now my heart?
I don’t care as long as we are not apart...
Let’s leave this place... I don’t know where to…
Its ok, I don’t care... as long as I’m with you…

Hey Jill we’re like bonnie and Clyde
So are you telling me you’re tired?
No my heart, I will stand still… with you I am strong
I hope I won’t be weak if something goes wrong

I’m stumbling… I’m stumbling my love… its getting tougher…
I’m tired Jack… I’m tired… things are getting rougher…
Please hold on.. Come run after me.. It’s not always easy…
I don’t know jack… I don’t want to be sleazy…

Come run after me… come jill… just a little bit more…
I have no answer jack… im getting sore…
I understand… just take a rest.. I will wait for you…
I’ll wait my love… I’ll wait.. or let me come to you…




I was drunk and cried myself to sleep...
But that didnt... still... gave me the peaceful and deep slumber that i am wanting..
I smoked like a chimney..
With every puff that i take and every breath i released is as much as hurt inside me...
Rapid and incessantly...
I went to sleep.. woke up... but still wanting you...
My heart cries for you...
Yearning for you..
In silent...
In the dark...
I want you back...
Please let me have you back...
Its kinda pathetic really...
And then i realized...
I can still love you... without me telling you..
Or the whole world...
But right now.. i just want to sleep...
A lot of it...
Ive never given much of a choice in this matter.
I have to act normal... like nothing happened.
Just last week i was offered by my mom to go home and manage an offer that was hard to resist. I thought about it...
I was with her when mom called...
I was staring at her..
And everytime i stare at her theres a thought in my head that saying "i wanna be with her... she is the girl that i love"
I said its a good start...
I was about to do the biggest decision in my life... i did not tell cos i want to do it when its all done..
Cos words for me are sacred...
The situation is unsure but my feelings arent...
Finally.... i have her....
Finally... she made me live again...
But suddenly... we broke up...
And i know.. as long as im loving her...
As long as i have this feeling for her...
I know i will sleep and wake up and live everyday wanting her...
needing her...
missing her...
Loving her...
It hurts... hurts a lot..
Cos i know no matter what i do... none of my gestures will bring her back to me...
I will always love you pretty girl...
And i can say... like the song... you are my "the one that got away"...

Wednesday, August 26, 2015


So the girlfriend didnt texted me... or should i say,,, been cold for a few days (bago mag 22)...
Givin' me a hints like "mag-uusap tayo pagpunta mo dito"... 
I even asked, is this good or bad? ( alam niyo na... when a girl said LETS TALK, kabahan ka na.).
She told me, "depende sa magiging dating sayo".

Friday night (21), i took the bus going to  fairview with a boquet of flowers... 
We we're texting along the way.. no i love yous and sweet nothings.
and said , "mag-usap na lang tayo pag lasing na sila" (her housemates).
i told her, text na lang niya ko pag lasing na sila, cos ill just be chillin at SM.
She then told me, punta na ko cos she misses me (eh di kinilig naman ako).. and the truth is, i miss her too.

When we i got there, they were all sleeping and didnt have the courage to give the flowers just yet (iniwan ko sa porch or something).
then they woke up, no kiss,... no hug.. no smile...
i played it cool... nag-antay ng oras kung kelan niya ko kakausapin...
then nag-inom... (and i got tipsy easily)..
while we were drinking, patugtog ba naman siya ng songs like "i love you goodbye", "before i let you go" and the likes..
ubos ang isang set, they were waiting for someone na magpapainom. eh since its kinda awkward not doing anything, sabi ko sakin na isang set. Kami ng bestfriend niya nag bumili.
And the bestfriend is telling me things like, "wala pa ding magbabago ha?" ... "friends pa din tayo ha".. and told her, oo naman... but my mind wasnt there really... gusto ko na lang masolo at makausap si girlfriend.

tuloy  ang inuman... then dumating na si lui (yung inaantay nila)...
then the girlfriend went upstairs...

after a while, tinawag ako, in her .. i dunno if pagalit voice.... 
at the stairs going to 2nd floor, i saw lights going to 3rd floor/rooftop... (paliko so you gonna wonder where the lights are coming from)
she then smiled... and the gesture of her hand told me to continue,..
i was speechless...
and surprised...
each steps of the stairs, was candlelit in both ends...
puno ng scattered petal of white flowers...
and lil notes ng spelled I LOVE YOU, which i have to pick up as i step up...
and those notes, got quotes by the way, few of her favorites maybe. :)
pagtapak ko ng 3rd floor, napamura na lang ako sa isip ko (DAMN!).. haha
nakaset up anng table with wine on the top of it, and wine glass..  scattered flowers everywhere, dim lighted venue, pink curtains and ceiling, floating candles.and love songs as our background...
and oo nga pala, sa table, may personalized card for me, which made by her of course... and a letter... :)
sa sarili ko, chick ba ko ngayon? hahaha
i stared at her with the sweetest smile on my face.... 
wala lang, i smelled the surprise, but i wasnt sure kung ano... 
 when her song for me played, i just dunno what to react.. haha.
Kaya bago pa ko maging chick ng tuluyan, tumayo ako, went to her, kissed her, i said thank you and i love you... and hugged her... :)

that night was so kilig *pa'chick voice*

so there...
im keeping the video and the pictures..
ill upload it soon... mga next year. haha


Thank you girlfriend
I love love you.... :*


love, waidee

Tuesday, November 25, 2014

it's you... its always been you...

sue and chivaz seems to be the perfect lover.. sweet as a candy, strong as a pyramid ika nga..
they've been together for almost four years.they started as a long distance lover.
they have met because of sue's friend maribel na kaibigan din ni chivaz.
sue owns a small clothing business in pasay while chivaz is a pediatrician in a small town in quezon  province.
they seldom see each  other but when they do, they are inseparable. Isang bagay lang naman ang pinag-aawayan nila, chivaz is so uptight habang si sue, she wants freedom to do what she wants.
The typical boy who lives in the province, and the liberated girl that she loves.

"haynaku! hinala na naman!" sambit ni Sue sa kaibigang si Maribel.
"who?" said maribel
."si chivaz...  di kasi ako nakapagreply agad. pag di talaga to tumigil ng kakahinala, its better maghiwalay na kami. Nakakapagod din" Sue replied.
tumawa lang si maribel. Sanay na siya sa dalawa.
Maya-maya, she told Sue, "alam mo, masiyado ka lang niyang sigurong mahal... takot siyang mawala sayo haha."

"Sinasama ko nga siya sa mga lakad ko para wala siyang masabi." pagsusumbong na sabi ni sue.

"Sue, i know your boyriend.. Hindi siya sanay sa lifestyle mo. To him, it's like just wasting time! hahaha" Maribel told Sue.
"But Bel, it's not a wasted time if I am enjoying. Specialy sana kung kasama ko siyang nag-eenjoy.
and sue added "I love him Bel... But I can't live like this. I've reached out. Di naman niya ko pwedeng ilayo sa mga kaibigan ko."

It's always been like that for chivaz and Sue. But what is a relationship without some quarrels right?

The day came when sue finaly decided to take some time off.
They met in a coffee shop near Sue's botique.
"why Sue?" kunot noong tanong ni Chivaz sa girlfriend niya. Makikita mo sa mukha niya ang disappointment and disagreement sa sinabi ni Sue.
 "Ayoko na ng ganito. Nasasakal na ko. Let's take a break.", she answered
"What if I don't want to?" chivaz asked.
"then give me freedom to do what I want" Sue replied..
"no sue, its cool off or let's call it off. mamili ka", Chivaz demanded
"I'm sorry chivaz, take it or leave it" Sue said firmly.

Chivaz was so mad that he left Sue at the coffee shop. For him, ang hinihingi ng girlfriend niya ay para na ring magbreak sila.
Pinagbabawalan lang naman ang girlfriend niya because he grew up in a conservative family plus the fact na hindi naman siya nasanay sa ganung lifestyle.
He loves her girlfriend so much and he is aware of the other guys na nagpaparamdam at nagpapalipad hangin kay Sue.

Days passed.. naging weeks.. And no word from each other,.
Ginugol ni chivaz ang oras niya sa trabaho. But still waiting for  her girlfriend to call her.
Si Sue naman, she misses Chivaz but this is what she wanted.

Until Milton became close to her. Milton had feelings for Sue.
They became close. And Sue is really enjoying his company. They share some common interest.
Milton then asked Sue to be her girlfriend. Sue hesitated.
Kahit naman ganun ang situaton nila ni chivaz, inaantay pa rin niya ito.
Two months has passed and still no word from chivaz.
Sue had some sleepless nights.

Is  it time for her to move on?
She thought of it a million times and the day came, she decided t make milton his boyfriend.

Their friends was shocked ofcourse..

Chivaz heard the news and confronted sue. The conversation didnt went well.

The moments she had with milton was enough to make her happy, but deep inside, not enough to forget Chivaz.

As any relationship would be, masaya talaga sa umpisa. The real test there, pag tumagal na.
She thought Milton would be different. But who was she kidding?
Milton was really jealous with Chivaz. It's not easy to erase the memories she had with him.
Sapat na si chivaz ang dahilan ng pag-aaway nila.

And those nights that Sue would feel alone, she would call Chivaz.
As much as chivaz want to comfort the girl of her life, di pa rin mawala sa isip niya na iniwan siya.
Madalas nauuwi sa away ang mga pag-uusap nila.

So Sue continued her relationship with Milton.
she tried.. She tried as much as she can.
But we can't teach the heart to think if its nature is to love.

She broke up with Milton...

She went to quezon... To chivaz....

He was surprised... Kunot noo pa rin siya while staring at Sue na di makapagsalita.
Sue broke her silence and said "I miss you... "
Chivaz smiled sarcasticaly and asked, "Nag-away kayo ng boyfriend mo?"
"chivaz please.. hear me out", begged sue.

"Look Sue, I am not your spare tire"

"Chivaz, wala na kami... Ikaw ang mahal ko.."

"wala na kayo? so ako naman?", chivaz asked furiously

"may mahal ka na bang iba? Am I too late?" She then hugged Chivaz as tears raced down from her eyes.

His heart melted. Eto ang weakness niya.. ang makita niyang umiiyak si sue. and its undeniable. Mahal na mahal pa rin niya si Sue.
"No Sue, it's still you..."

Sue looked up to Chivaz and told him. "Be mine again Chivz... cos I am yours.. always been yours.. Hindi dahil wala na kami, ikaw na ulit.. Hindi ganun... Wala na kami, kasi ikaw lang.. ikaw lang talaga... Make me yours again Chivz, cos to me, it's always been you."

Chivaz looked back at her... He can see the sincerity. Yes, she's mad at this woman for leaving her.
His ego was hurt when there was another guy involved, but she cant deny the fact that she really love her.
His pride or his love? He didn't hesitated and hugged  Sue. "I love you Sue... We will never start again... cos for me, it never stopped,,,"

Sue's heart was filled with happiness she hugged and kissed chivaz like it was their first and last.




*fiction only
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